November 14th
2:03pm

I've noticed recently that many many people who claim to be Christians are not real Christians at all. I've been reading what some people call the Jefferson Bible, but its true title is The Life and Morals of Jesus of Nazareth by Thomas Jefferson. It's Jefferson's personal edition of the Bible that he used to explain to people his religious beliefs. It only includes parts of the Bible involving Jesus, with all the miracles and mysticism removed. He doesn't walk on water, he doesn't cure the blind, he doesn't feed a village with a basket of fish, and he isn't resurrected after his crucifixion. It's a simple telling of the life Jesus lived and the lessons he preached during it. After reading this, I've begun to realize the true nature of Christianity, not what is widely known as Christianity today. What is Christian is simply the beliefs of Christ (Jesus). Just as the beliefs of Sigmund Freud would be considered "Freudian", or the beliefs of Faust to be "Faustian". A Christian is, removing all of the extra rituals and practices, someone who strictly adheres to the teachings and beliefs of Jesus. They aren't simply "Christian" but "Christ-ian". Once you understand this, you're able to see the obvious corruptions and blasphemies present through all sects of Christianity. This, of course, can also be applied to nearly every religion widely practiced today. I believe this is mostly due to the fact that people raise their children to be religious, causing said children to believe things unquestioningly until eventually religion devolves into something that is entirely separated from reality. How is it that Christians believe Jesus, who was as human as you or I, could walk on water? Reading the Bible, it is so painfully clear that it is a metaphor, yet today's western Christians believe that Jesus literally walked on water. Because of this, non-Christians view self-proclaimed Christians to be idiots for believing in such a clearly impossible feat, and Christians make themselves out to be fools, but in reality, most Christians have never read the Bible, and do not closely follow the teachings of Christ. For this reason, I still cannot in good conscience consider myself a Christian, though I do pray and practice some Christian rituals. I simply see Jesus for what he truly is: one of the many great men throughout history that many people can learn from. I treat Jesus in much the same way that I treat Marcus Aurelius, or Miyamoto Musashi, or Siddhartha Gautama, or Lao Tzu. All great men who lived great lives, and in those lives they learned many lessons which they felt necessary to share. Each of these men has their own distinct philosophical flavor, Aurelius focusing specifically on what it is to be a good man, Musashi focusing entirely on overcoming an opponent, Gautama on dealing with suffering in one's life, and Lao Tzu on understanding the way that things are by unlearning your preassumptions and biases. The truth is that Jesus never intended to begin a new religion. Jesus was born Jewish, raised Jewish, and died Jewish. He believed in the Jewish God, but unlike his fellow Jews, Jesus had felt the presence of what the Jews called God, what the Taoists call the Tao, what the Buddhists call Enlightenment, and what many educated Westerners considered common sense or simply the way that things are. He is simply one of a handful of men throughout history that were able to see things for what they were, and he saw that his people, the Jews, had lost sight of what God really was. Paying taxes and tithes to God, jailing people for working on the Sabbath day, the Jews of Jesus' time are much like the modern Christians of our own time, blindly following a rulebook that has been taught to them since childhood, with such an unquestioning loyalty that they might be willing to kill in the name of God were it necessary, and never for even a moment asking themselves whether what they believe makes any sense at all.

June 10th
5:23pm

For most of my childhood I was Christian. For most of my adolescence I was atheist. During my atheistic years I explored the depths of nihilism and the belief that there really was nothing after death, and that nothing in life mattered. From this point, I believe many people choose one of two paths: "If nothing in life really matters, then life itself doesn't matter, and I should just kill myself to get it over with," or, "Well nothing in life means anything, so why don't I just create my own meaning for it all then?" I, thankfully, chose the second path, and have been "creating my own meaning" from life ever since. It is during this process that I was once again exposed to religion, this time much later than I originally had been. Religion was no longer something that I was raised into and was supposed to believe unquestioningly, I now had the mental ability to read and understand religious texts for myself. To understand what the real meanings of the phrases were. I first was exposed to Buddhism through, funnily enough, the manga Vagabond by Takehiko Inoue. Miyamoto Musashi was a devout Zen Buddhist, as were many good men of his time. This lead me to read Alan Watts' What is Zen? which helped me fully understand just what all the fuss was about. After reading this, I found that I could finally understand the Tao Te Ching after many months of having no idea of what I was reading. It may seem silly, but it's very similar to the cliche martial arts movie trope that requires a young man to attain some sort of ancient powerful knowledge before he can truly understand his purpose. After gaining this understanding, I felt that I had attained a new way of seeing life that I had never felt before. A way of life that made everything wonderful and enjoyable and that cured my worries for a short time. I will not give creedence to the naysayers because I know what I have felt, but I must note that I've seen many people of present who treat Zen as some sort of hip new philosophy that they can use to view the world through, until they switch to the next one. Many many people my age obsess too heavily over the idea of the Tao or Zen or anything related, that to outsiders they just seem like crazy schizos. I must clarify, that I do not, nor have I ever, called myself a Buddhist, I simply find its principles very useful in my life.

With me now being accepting of Buddhism though, I've since opened up to the spiritual world as a whole. I believe in many things that I know are not factually true, but I still believe that they are good beliefs to hold. For example, the existence of magic and alchemy. I could write an entire page for these alone, so I won't get into it, but I bring these up only to cement the idea that I am now open to spirituality and what some would consider "mistruths and falsehoods". About a month ago I listened to an explanation of a book of the Bible, and in that explanation came the following quote:

Then came Peter to him, and said, 'Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Till seven times?'"
Jesus saith unto him, 'I say not unto thee, until seven times, but, until seventy times seven.'"

Ever since I heard this, I've slowly become more and more of a follower of Christianity. I enjoy reading the Bible, and I think there are many lessons to be gained from it. I do not go to church, and I don't ever plan on it. I don't believe there is anyone out there that can properly determine for me what my beliefs should be, I have to uncover them myself. Now that we've made it to the present day, this page is dedicated to, as you may have guessed, any notes or thoughts that I have on Christianity, be it lessons from the Bible, thoughts on modern Christianity, or anything else related to Christianity.